Gravity of Time

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Quote of the Day:  “Time makes you bolder, children get older, I’m getting older, too.” ~ Stevie Nicks

I’m feeling nostalgic today as I turn a year older and the small child graduates from Third Grade.  They say that your past comes back to you as your child journeys forward. Perhaps it is because we feel so intrinsically close to our children, that we not only want to share our joys with them; but, also share our pain and hardships in order to protect and guide them.

As much as I try not to do it;  it is very hard not to compare our lives; the similarities and the differences.  It was 1972 when I graduated from Third Grade.  My parents split that year and we shuttled between Germany, Cleveland and Ohio.  I was a straight “A” student (tickets to the Big Red Machine to prove it:), the best speller in the Mrs. McConnaughey and Ward’s class and the most terrified child on the planet.   It wasn’t easy trying to figure things out when you are eight going on nine years old.

As I look at my beautiful child and reflect on her Third Grade year I feel a sense of relief and gratitude.   Relief that history did not repeat itself.  Gratitude that I was able, for my family’s sake, to remain an optimist about love and life.  And a certain feeling of honor and ownership that I am able to share with her knowledge about worlds that are not so perfect.

I always accused my Mama as looking at life through rose colored glasses.  Thank you, Mama, for leaving those glasses on the nightstand for me. I promise I will leave them behind for the small child; however, I think she was born wearing a pair of her own 🙂

On June 8, 1963, Herta Renges Craft gave birth to the last of  her six children.  Thank you, Mama, for the gift of life, the gift of contentment and 48 happy birthdays!!  xoxo!!

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She is Going to be a Handful.

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Quote of the Day:  “On the day that you were born the angels got together and decided to create a dream come true.  So they sprinkled gold dust in your hair and golden starlight in your eyes so blue.”

Dear Small Child,

Nine years ago, today, all my dreams came true with one deep breath and one small push.  Okay, so it was many deep breaths, many big pushes and promise to divorce your father if I survived the ordeal.  However, the moment our eyes connected, and I knew it was for real, it was love at first sight, and all the rest was history.

You didn’t come to us easily and when you did decide to make your appearance, you found it fashionable to be early.  You were due to arrive on May 5, Cinco de Mayo, and I had a plan.  You would have brown hair and eyes (like me); and we would name you Maya, to commemorate the occasion.  Well, I should have known when the amnio technician said, in his thick, French accent “She is going to be a handful” that all my plans were going to hell in a tuille basket.  At week 37 (April 20) when things seemed amiss and I felt the urgency to vacuum the garage, I knew that my plans were further going astray.   All it took was look and a word from your Uncle Joe saying, “that baby is coming tonight” that I realized there was no way out of this predicament.  Daddy, too, was not prepared.  He was sharing some fabulous wine with your Uncle Joe.  We all suggested that maybe he stick with one glass on this particular eve.  Ah, the best laid plans.  Let’s just say, when 4:00 a.m. rolled around on April 21, your Daddy was feeling as nauseous as I on the winding way down the mountain.

As it was, at 7:36 on April, 21, 2002 you came into this world, with a smile on your face and a look in your eye.   My first thought was, hooray, the doctor didn’t drop you, my second thought was that you looked exactly like “the greys”.  The proof was on the table, I had been abducted and impregnated by aliens.  In all seriousness, you were much prettier than the greys; less grey, more pink, with big, beautiful, blue eyes and blond hair.

Of course, I say this all in jest, because that is how we Sinclairs roll.  The reality is I often wonder how it came to be that I was so lucky to get you. You are truly an amazing human being; you are kind, you are generous, you are loving, you are courageous, you care and are considerate, you love nature, you love animals, you are interested and interesting, you are joyful and honest.   Of course, any mother would say these things about their child.  These are not my words.  These are the words of the people who teach you, the people who ride with you, the people who love you. Happy Birthday, sweet Aya Bean, my forever handful!